Monday, October 4, 2010

The Five Steps of Productivity





There are a few things that must happen in a morning or afternoon to set yourself up for a productive day. Step one. Put on a bra. If you, female, want to do even the least bit of things, you must go to your drawer, remove your sleep shirt and put on a bra. That is all I will say on that. If you are male, putting on a bra would just be weird so don’t do it. Step two includes a hot beverage. It may mean you go to your local coffee shop to get a latte or it may mean you turn on the teapot and rinse out the French press from yesterday’s beans. Whichever route you choose to go, drinking a hot beverage in the am is a necessary step in being productive for all you tea drinkers, I too am a tea drinker. You can get an earl grey or some P&G tips and you will achieve the same results. Being someone, however, who walks confidently on the tea and coffee border, I can say that there is something more magical in drinking coffee in the morning as opposed to tea. Beans in the morning and a bag at night. The third step in being productive has to be getting dressed. Now, just because the bra is on does not mean the rest of the non-pajama clothing is on. I, at 4:00 this day just got dressed. I already feel productive and it is only after following steps 1-3 that I am able to write. The fourth step to being productive would be to make your bed. Now, making your bed, with yourself NOT in it, implies that your time there is over. You are closing the down door for the day to hopefully, if you want to be productive, be productive. I must put that last step in because I am well aware that steps one thru three can all be done while then coming back to the tempter that is a king size bed. The fifth and final step in productivity would be to give your child or self or anyone around who is is either asleep or willing a bangin tattoo. With steps 1-5 in place, you are now able to go about your day.


it's an owl if you couldn't tell.


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